Today's post came out of a discussion in a coaching group that I'm a member of. (Online Coach Support by Colleen Roberts - I highly recommend Colleen to all coaches. She's the Coach's Coach!)
Thank you Colleen for providing this 5 minute clip from our meeting!
And thank you for having the text of it transcribed.
You teach us the very best tools!
Tonight, I'll say something a little different than what I usually talk about.
Sitting here listening to you ladies talk, reminds me of a thought I had about the stories in our lives and the things that happen to us, and how we keep those thoughts gathered around us.
In Hawaii, we wear the flower lei, the beautiful flower lei... and the stories that we carry with us, and the thoughts that we keep around us, are like the flowers that we choose to put in our lei.
Then wear that lei around our necks and have the beauty and the scent of it with us all day long while we go around.
Of course, we want to choose beautiful flowers, but sometimes we get a flower that's broken or a flower that wilts or one that for some reason just starts to smell bad. Maybe it rots a little bit.
Maybe it started out looking like a beautiful bloom and then, oh no!
We can choose to keep these flowers in our lei ...or if a flower starts to smell bad, we can pull it out of the lei and toss it out; we can make room for a new flower in there, or maybe this time we choose a fern, or a different colour, or something that's going to serve us better.
When I think about the stories in my life and the stories that I keep around me, I realize there are different kinds: stories that have served me, stories that have not! Stories that I've kept, and stories that I've put aside -- and more stories that I will gather around me in the future, and more stories that I will someday discard because maybe they're actually a burden and I don't realise it yet.
I think of stories that my father told me when I was a little girl. He would sit on the foot of my bed and I would beg him for a bedtime story... and he would tell me stories about, oh, about Little Red Riding Hood and how she missed the warning signs and almost got eaten up by the big bad wolf! And she would have perished if there hadn't been help to come in and resue her.
Or he would tell me about Goldilocks and the Three Bears, and how Goldilocks was greedy, and a bad citizen, and got herself into trouble because she went into other people's houses without permission and ate their food! - and then the bears found her, and she got frightened and had to run away.
He would tell me his favourite, The Three Little Pigs and how that last pig saved his own bacon from the big bad wolf by being resourceful and clever and and calling upon his own resources.
Now as I looked back, I realize there were certain important themes to the stories that my father would tell me.
And as I grew up, and he grew older, he would still tell me stories and they were different, they were more true to life, but still there were four strong themes that really emerged.
The first one of them was to think my own thoughts ...and not listen to the big bad wolf. Because too often the wolves have their own agenda, and their plans for you are for their own profit, at your expense.
The second theme was to make my own decisions. To make choices based upon my own thoughts, not based on the messages or advice of others.
The third was to find my inner resources and strengths, just like the little pig did. He found his cleverness and he found what he could do. The little pig couldn't be superman, he couldn't be bigger than the big bad wolf, he couldn't grow big teeth, but he had his thoughts and he had his resources.
The last theme is to use my thoughts, decisions, and my resources to act on my own behalf so I can move forward in my life. So I can take action to create the life that I want to live, take actions to affect the world around me and create the world that I want to live in.
So ladies, I want to thank you tonight for reminding me...
Reminding me how the stories in our lives are like the flowers in a lei ...and sometimes you wear them for a long time, and sometimes some of the stories stop serving you, so you have to pluck them out, and discard them from your life... and put in a new and more beautiful one.
- Aloha, Linda